OUT of the SHADOWS

Two Beautiful Days!  Atlanta in the Fall... I love this time of year.

And in some respects I'm also in the Fall of my own life.  40 years.  I've been through the 'Spring and birth, Summer and the time of youth and freedom', and now I'm looking at a new time, at a new place in my life.

For over two decades I've lived in the shadows. I've lived so long trying to be what others perceived or expected me to be that I never truly found my own path.  I can look back at the major decisions that I've made and see me trying to fit myself into the square hole (round peg).

The love I've given has always been from my heart, but there are many times that I just didn't understand why those that I love would want me to be anything other than who I truly am.  But I can't blame anyone but myself.  The only way to be who I am, is to listen to my own heart and follow its lead - not let others dictate who I am.  

I want the advice and guidance of those I respect, but even then I have to find my own path.

I can truly say that I've lived in the shadows of the church. My parents. My family.  The loves I've had.  Even allowed the world to tell me who I should be and how I should act.  And I've taken more lead from those who had my 'best interests at heart' than listening to my own heart.

So I'm coming out of the Shadows.  I actually think John Mayer's song hits it right on the head.

"Hard times help me see...

I’m a good man with a good heart
Had a tough time, got a rough start
But I finally learned to let it go
Now I’m right here, and I’m right now
And I’m hoping, knowing somehow
That my shadow days are over
My shadow days are over now"

~ John Mayer, Shadow Days