Life is Short

Ok people, I'm tired.  Tired of wasting days and misplacing my life with the solemn sidesteps of what others might think is the 'right' way to live.  I'm 40.  I've been through some very dark and lonely places, and I've had times when I felt I just couldn't breathe.  Felt alone.  Felt so overwhelmed by beliefs and decrees that were pushing and pulling at me from all sides.  My family.  My so-called friends.  My peers.

A little infant died.  I didn't know the child or the family, but it affected someone.  There were tears.  There was sorrow.  It amazes me and confounds me when this happens.  Why? Why God, would you allow this?  Are you really there?  Are you even listening?

I don't know the answers, but I know that this life is SHORT!  I don't know what's left for me, but I want to love the people I love, carry those who need a hand, help someone.  I want to live.  Lay back on a dock and look at the stars.  Not regret and not surrender to what others may think.  I don't want to fear so much that I can't breathe.

I wrote this for the little infant... but as much for me.

There are tears a fallin’
grace seems so misplaced
How can we remember
little one taken away
                so soon
                so soon

Songs, they’re a playin’
mournful hymns, agonizing hearts
Bringing in the procession
melody echoes and here we are
                so soon
                so soon

Gather up the courage
Mom held her a little while
she wasn’t even able
to grow into a child
                why so soon
                so soon

Tears fall
Why do we stall
Can’t waste another day
Hearts beat
Find it bittersweet
The way we waste away our days

And the end will come…
                so soon

And when we’re done…
                so soon
                so soon

Will they remember you?

7/29/12
clc